Friday, December 30, 2011

New Year's

My vacation in Ohio is coming to a close and with the New Year's coming up, I've realized some things.

1) I haven't the slightest idea what the song Good King Wenceslas is about nor know any of the words.

2) Doesn't matter what city or state you're in, Wal Mart is full of the most fucked up people. There have been reports of fights in Wal Marts across the nation. What I'm absolutely sure of is they are not fighting over hygiene products.

3) On Stern, Chaz Bono admits he hates to masturbate to the thought of girls he knows or that aren't porn stars because he thinks it's insulting to them. I would like to apologize to the majority of the female population if you have felt insulted by me for the past 22 years.

4) Listening to and watching the biographies of Selena Gomez, Lady Gaga, Jonah Hill, and most of the cast of SNL has made me more depressed about my lack of efforts in show business.
5) Shingles affects 1 in 3 people and is reported to be more painful than child birth and can be fatal in some people.

6) I'm not in a mainstage show this semester and am ecstatic thinking about what I'm going to do with that time. I won't call it free time because I've never considered time to be free if there is something more I could be doing.

7) After talking to my Dad about his Republican views, I now believe the only thing the GOP lacks is a great PR director. His views make sense and are backed up with facts, but anyone can say anything on TV or in a bar that contradicts it and can be considered fact.

8) My God there are a shitload of TV shows on that have an hour to solve a case.

9) Sinead O'Connor has done her part keeping up the sanctity of marriage.

10) I was reminded that the taking a chance/failure gap is enormously smaller in college than it is in the real world. The chances that my friends and family are taking right now blows my mind. They are stepping off a cliff and trusting the air to keep them afloat. I will continue to juggle and memorize lines thank you. I am so proud of you.

11) After talking to my friends in the education system, I am more convinced than ever what I have been teaching this year. Our students are more concerned about cell phones, facebook, being right, being told what to do, finding excuses not to take chances, etc than exploring life, creativity, and challenging themselves.
Worst of all, it's starting earlier and earlier in elementary schools.

12) On that same point, School boards and superintendents can suck my dick. Oh, and please refer to #3 so you don't insult me. Stop making educators jobs everything but being about the students.

13) If our local and federal government is asking for more money through taxes, what they're really saying is " Hey, I know we're trillion dollars in debt, but we think we know where we went wrong, so give us more money and we'll fix it. We promise we won't fuck it up again." Hey, get a financial consultant.

14) A man with tourettes on a plane saying "Happy Holidays" every 30 seconds is so much better than a crying baby.

15) Watching the Baylor/Washington Bowl game was like watching the equivalent to a home run derby.

16) When people get gift cards for Christmas and take them in the store the day after Christmas, what do they expect to be on the shelves?

17) Trevin Cooper and I have proven that the two of us can have the nerdiest and most ridiculously obscure jokes about the History of Musical Theater. Who else would laugh at the text "After my 9/11 show, I'm going to write a musical like West Side Story but have The Theater Syndicate vs. The Schuberts" Oh, the comedy!!! Fact is, he laughed a lot at that.

18) Some of my favorite people got engaged over Christmas time and I congratulate all of them. I'm not weary about one of them.

19) After being in NYC for a week and coming to Ohio, my masseuse who's been working on me for years here said (not knowing I had been to NYC) "Your muscles are as tight as they were when you used to live in NYC." One week folks. I built up the defense wall of tension that I've spent 1.5 years getting rid of.

20) I confused a lot of people when I said I was heading home for a week and they assumed I meant Ohio. I'm happy to say I'm a New Yorker. Will always be a New Yorker. And that is truly my home. If I ever live there again is a question. I can't remember when that feeling changed inside me.

21) I'm a member of Urban nation. Please hop on board.